How to support a friend with anxiety

Chances are that you know someone experiencing anxiety. Nearly a third of young people aged 16-24 in the UK have reported experiencing symptoms of anxiety or depression. 

You might find yourself wanting to help a housemate, friend or family member, but it can be challenging to know exactly what to say or do. To support, we've put together some helpful tips you can use for yourself and others.

Understand that anxiety can be different for everyone

Not everyone with anxiety will experience the same symptoms or triggers. For some they may experience irritability or constantly feeling 'on edge'. Others may experience physical symptoms such as feeling sick or having shortness of breath. By researching and understanding different anxiety types, you will develop a better understanding of what your friend is going through. This can allow you to empathise with your friend's experience and help you identify times where they may need support. More information can be found here on anxiety.

Validate their feelings

Many different things can make a person anxious. Whilst these may not make sense to you, it's important that your friend feels understood. Be careful not to belittle your friend's experience. What they are feeling is real and providing reassurance is an important aspect of the support you can provide. Be mindful not to legitimise or stigmatise their anxieties about 'what if this happens'. Simply let them know you are here to listen, that you acknowledge their anxious feelings, and reassure that it is okay for them to feel this way.

Be aware of your impact

Anxiety is an inner bully and can convince those with it that they are a burden to others. Interactions, situations, and experiences that may seem small to you can easily be enough to trouble your anxious friend. Simple actions such as letting your friend know if you can't respond to a message or that you may be late for your plans tomorrow can help ease some of the anxiety. You can also make a positive impact by reassuring them that you enjoy their company. Letting them know how much you value them as your friend can make a real difference.

Ask how to help them

Different things work for different people. Chances are that your friend may already have some methods that help them manage their anxiety, some of which you could assist with. These could involve breathing exercises, going for walks or a chat. You could help in other ways too, such as breaking down a task or providing distraction when their anxiety is intense. By establishing what works for your friend, you can develop a plan to best support their needs.

Look after yourself too

It's hard to help others if you're not helping yourself first! It's great that you want to support someone with anxiety, but make sure you're not overdoing it. Ensure you're setting up healthy boundaries. Regularly take time to recharge or focus on other aspects of your life. Ensuring the person your helping knows who they can speak to for further, professional guidance can also be a great way of supporting them.

Support them to seek help

Anxiety is something we can all experience, especially around stressful or new experiences in our lives. If the anxiety is becoming too overwhelming, or it has lasted for a longer period for your friend, you can direct them to the help available. You may want to offer to help them arrange a GP appointment, or a visit to your student services wellbeing team. More information on these services along with local organisations in your community can be found via the Hub of Hope platform (QR codes can be found in your flat and around the accommodation for ease).

At Student Roost, we understand that students can often experience poor mental health whilst at university. We are here to support all our residents; if you or someone you wish to support is at one of our properties, you can check out our Wellbeing hub for info to find support or other resources.